Meet my first three good strangers (Justin, Chase and David). Don’t let this photo scare you. Good strangers come in all kinds of packages- including those of massive facial hair, along with crazed and psychotic expressions.
After moving to Alabama, I ventured out one evening for dinner. By ‘venture’ I mean downstairs, out the side door of my building, taking four steps to the right and into a bar/restaurant. If as a female, you’ve ever walked into an ‘establishment’ alone you may tend to scan the room to figure out where you want to sit. At a table or at the bar. I usually feel guilty taking up a table that two or more people need so off to the bar I went. Plus, you can ‘kind of’ blend in if there are several people already sitting there. If you’re the ONLY one there, hold your own and who cares if people at tables incorrectly assume you’re lonely. Just enjoy the experience! I tend to prefer the end bar stool. It’s a prime seat if you like to people watch and are slightly claustrophobic.
I found my spot at the bar and ‘Beer Jesus (Chase)’, as locals fondly refer to him, quickly and attentively asked me “whatcha’ havin’ pretty lady”. Quick service and a compliment- a good start. Now here is where some anxiety sets in, not because of seeing my first long bearded ponytail wearing bartender but because I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I heard my new town had a great craft beer scene; however, I didn’t have much experience with craft at the time. You see, I grew up in a small DRY COUNTY with a population of 8,143 at that time so there was zero exposure to craft. Plus, in my 20’s and early 30’s, my life was less about exploring and more about surviving. Therefore, I thought ‘good’ beer consisted of Guinness, Sam Adams, Amber Bock or my pre-craft favorite, Negra Modelo (don’t knock it, its great after you mow your yard). So instead of asking for something ‘uncool’, I said ‘ let me think about it’. I don’t know if he saw the anxiety in my eyes or if it was just years of experience dealing with my kind (probably both) that caused him to say “take your time”. He graciously smiled and gave me the craft beer list to scan rather than be impatient and just stand there. So off he went to wait on his other customers while I contemplated.
Now after about two minutes David (who by the way is a disc golf superstar with a cute dachshund), says “just move into town”? When you are in the biggest small town ever, the locals tend to know when there is a new face. I told him yes, what brought me to the area and that I worked in the field of child abuse. He made me feel comfortable and immediately more relaxed. He was the entertainer of the threesome. Would he be the one I asked about which craft beer to order? I’m scanning the menu. IPA, I had no idea what that was or tasted like! Can I sample it first? Is that wrong to ask? A sour? Who would want sour beer? Maybe I should just order bourbon, but wait, the list consists of SO many fancy bourbons. Ones I’ve never had! How about a gin and tonic with extra lime? I knew I liked that. I wasn’t in the mood for red wine. But wait, I came here to try local craft beer and that’s what I was going to do.
Now at this point David had moved on to other customers while I was ‘deciding’. Every profession has unspoken rules. The ones you don’t know or understand unless you work in that industry. I sure didn’t want to be ‘one of those’ annoying customers. You know, the kind that ask their bartender to make a barely known cocktail consisting of 10 ingredients with some crazy name like “The Red Fingernail” or “A Lonely Island Lost In the Middle of a Foggy Sea”. I mean this could be my new hang out if I didn’t get put on ‘the list’. At least the list I imagined.
Next up to help the new girl in the bar was Justin (appropriately his last name is Craft and has great teeth). He casually made his way over to check on me. Now at this point I wondered if there was some kind of code word or secret body language that the three of them used to relay to one another my obvious (but hoping not obvious) plight. Justin, or better known as Juggy, decided it was time for ‘the quiz’. The quiz that I have come to watch all of them so skillfully do with other customers. The one where you ask several preference questions without making the new craft explorer feel stupid. It takes skill, especially if they are slammed, because I’ve since then seen it done in frustrated tones by bartenders in my travels, and I could immediately feel the embarrassment of the poor souls next to me. And when it happens, I finish my drink and leave. Done.
While Justin is giving me some samples (yes you can get them but don’t abuse the courtesy), both David and Chase discreetly make their way back over so see what the new girl chose. I’m sure there is some kind of happy dance they did afterward to celebrate. What did I chose? An IPA and a Peanut Butter Porter. I can’t recall what breweries made them but the IPA had lovely citrus undertones and wasn’t too hoppy. The porter….ah the porter. It was a magical blend that sparked childhood memories of peanut butter sandwiches and hints of chocolate. With the help of these funny, accommodating and kind fellas, my eyes were forever opened to the world of craft. I’m grateful to them for that. But not for the extra pounds I’ve gained.
They didn’t always work the same night, but when they did, the energy there was perfect. Others felt it too and commented on why they would frequent the hang out. When my friends would visit from out of state, who do you think I took them to meet? One of my friends loved her time there so much, she wrote a thank you note to them and the manager!
You see, I enjoyed my experience. Why? Because of their personalities, how they treated me and others . I also watched how they treated one another. They had fun back there behind that bar AND they knew their beverages well. I endearingly named them ‘The Three Amigos”. I continued to stop in for dinner and drinks as the months passed. There’s something to be said when you can message any of them ahead of time and they will save you a seat at the bar because you’re dealing with a bit of social anxiety that day. Each time, the experience was memorable- and on occasion it consisting of Chase protecting me from some drunk guy that was a little too much in my space or the ‘business man’ with ulterior motives wanting me to review a new venture. Clearly, these ‘good strangers’ were also protective when needed. I even witnessed them making sure people got home safely when some over indulged, not realizing the higher alcohol volume in some craft- hence the 10oz pour. See how much I learned?
All good things must come to an end. Or at least a new beginning. Each of them moved on to different places- a craft tap room, a brewery and a quaint bar. They are all doing well and they continue to take care of their customers with humor, patience, generosity and kindness. How do I know? Because I still visit these good strangers from time to time and when asked by others where to go, I give them the three locations. The feedback is always positive.
I think we can all learn something from ‘good strangers’- something beyond noticing just their kindness and good deeds.
Here are a few take-a-ways from my experience with them:
1. Tip ‘good’ bartenders and servers VERY well- not only for the experience and service but also because some of them have children to support.
2. Be patient. They have to remember all of our orders and preferences without a note pad, not to mention few bathroom breaks and personal trials all while dealing with occasional difficult and obnoxious customers.
3. They hear everything you say at the bar, even when you think they don’t.
4. If you become a regular, take them goodies (note the homemade cookie in photo).
5. And lastly, if you’re new to craft beer, and don’t know what to get- order the flight and ask them to select their favorites. They know best.
I look forward to sharing a shorter story next month. This one involves a kind sista’ who rescued me when I found myself lost, on foot, in a sketchy part of my new town.